NEED AND DESIRE 

Does everyone have a headache these days? By the way just popped in my mind one of my all time favourite movie, the "What woman want" :

The weather is very strange, one day it's freezing cold and the next day it's pleasantly cold. 

I was thinking a few days ago, how do you know for sure what you need?  

Someone very important to me once told me that what distinguishes needs (which are secondary things) from primary things (i.e. the most important things, e.g. the purpose that drives you in life) is that there is a lot of pressure on them. 

I've been thinking about that too, and I've come to the conclusion that it's something like when you feel you can't live without it, so you have to have it. 

For example, I need to eat...

when I'm hungry like a wolf :) 

I need to have food, otherwise I will be starving. 

I need to eat and I need to eat as soon as possible 

and as good as possible 😄 or I'll suffer, my stomach will hurt, then I will have a headache from hunger, I'll feel dizzy or nauseous so I'll feel physically sick.

Then I'll get tense so I might get into fights with people or I upset someone...so it's not good to be hungry and because it's a physical need that I can't really do anything about because my body gives me different pain signals when it's hungry, it's a big pressure on me to reduce the "pain". So it's a need I have to satisfy. 

But these secondary things (our needs) are also important. Without them we can't function properly and then we can't do the primary thing. So it's not something to be discounted, it's something to be aware of

...and to work out how to get our needs met so that we don't have to deal with it all the time, because then we don't have time or energy for what's most important. The things that we think give meaning to our life...

It's also an interesting question of how to distinguish between what we need and what we desire. Need is something that will take us forward if we are aware of what we need and desire is something that can chain us and make our path difficult or even impossible to achieve our purpose in life. 

For we may spend all our time and energy on satisfying our desires and thus completely forget about what we really wanted to achieve in life, what we thought was important. 

 LIFE'S PRECIOUS MOMENTS 

There are important moments in life that we sometimes miss because we’re in a rush. These are the moments we later realize were significant. We feel that we could have smiled at someone who matters to us, hugged them, or given them a small token that would have made them happy - or simply done something thoughtful.

                                     Ed Sheeran Give me love

Because there are people who are very important to us, and there are moments that truly matter -moments that may never come again. Of course, there will be other similar moments or people in the future, but they’ll never be quite the same as those we cherish now. Each person and each moment is unique, special, and unrepeatable.

But let’s not beat ourselves up if we miss an important moment. Instead, let’s remember to pause next time, even if we’re in a hurry. Take a moment, because we cannot recreate time or reverse what has already happened (or what didn’t happen). 

This reminds me of one of my favorite movies the "Groundhog Day"

Another thought I’ve been reflecting on is honesty. There are many people around me whom I genuinely like and respect, and I’ve noticed how sincere they are in what they say. They truly believe in what they’re talking about.

But here’s the thing: sincerity doesn’t necessarily mean they’re right. I mean… (now, this will be a little bit 💥hard to put into words) what is truth, really? Who decides what’s true and what’s not? From their perspective, they may be entirely correct, but that doesn’t mean we have to accept their truth just because they express it with conviction. 

I can accept their viewpoint as their perspective—one person’s take on reality, the world, and truth. But I can still have my own opinion and express it. And if others question what I say, I won’t immediately back down or change my views just because someone strongly defends theirs or loudly proclaims their stance. 

In fact, such intensity often makes me less inclined to accept their opinion.

Things change, and when someone makes very strong statements, it feels intimidating. It gives me the impression that they’re unwilling to see or understand other perspectives, which is a little bit 💥 off-putting to me.

But there are people (and I find these people much more likeable) who are quiet and observant, yet very attentive, with a lively look in their eyes, and they have their own opinions but never try to impose them on others. 

With them, I feel we can discuss things without anyone feeling hurt. They don’t give up their beliefs, but they don’t aggressively defend them either, and they avoid conflict.

These people don’t waste their energy on conflicts; instead, they focus on how they and those around them can grow. They don't depend on others, but they enjoy being in the company of others, and others generally love being around them because they give others the same freedoms they give themselves. The freedom of thought, the freedom of opinion, the freedom to act, the freedom to change, the freedom of joy. 

    

Django Freedom Anthony Hamilton covered by Mahmood 

WAITING

 I've been thinking about this for days… well, not just days, but for a long time… about waiting.

We often find ourselves in situations where we have to wait—for something or someone. It seems to me that waiting is difficult for many people. We don't like waiting. We want everything immediately, without delays, or at least we want an answer—either yes or no—but we dislike being in uncertainty and just waiting. Waiting often feels like wasting time.

However, I’ve noticed that sometimes, even this waiting time can be used for something, and then it doesn’t feel like wasted time at all.

For example, when I’m standing in line, I observe what’s happening around me. I look at people, the hat of the person in front of me, and I wonder how well that color would suit a dear friend of mine, how difficult it might be to knit such a hat, or how much it would cost—was it handmade or machine-made? My thoughts wander to trivial things, yet I find many of them interesting in that moment.

I also notice the items on the shelves, their prices, the colors of the boxes, or the posters I usually pass by without a glance. In short, instead of getting frustrated or trying to figure out how to skip ahead, I wait and use the time to look around, think about things, listen to music, or hum to myself (because I really love music). I don’t stare at people; I just observe, like others do… but I don’t get annoyed.

There’s a principle that fits this idea well, one taught by Silo from his book the Silo's Message, which says:

"7.   If you pursue an end, you enchain yourself. If everything you do is realized as though it were an end in itself, you liberate yourself."

                       by Rafael Edwards

And it’s not just this one principle that resonates with this feeling or experience. Another one says:

"2.   When you force something toward an end, you produce the contrary."

                        by Rafael Edwards

So I’m trying to understand and apply these principles in my life, even in small, everyday situations. Of course, there are much bigger, even dramatic moments when it’s good to remember them. Sometimes, no matter how much we want to speed up events or time, they move along their own path—and that’s not necessarily a bad thing.

Meanwhile, there’s so much we can do to give meaning to these seemingly “empty” or “useless” moments, hours, or days. We might even learn something we hadn’t considered before or discover something we didn’t notice existed.

Interestingly, in these moments, if we aren’t “hurrying” or “fretting,” things may stand out to us precisely because we need them or because the chaos and noise of daily life had previously prevented them from catching our attention. Perhaps they are incredibly useful or meaningful for us, or they inspire us in some way—just when we’re finally quiet enough to notice them.

Modern life pushes us into a relentless rush, leaving us little time to pause, look around, and marvel at things, to realize that there’s a world here and to see what this world is like.

These are the thoughts I wanted to share because I often notice how stressed and impatient people become when they have to wait—even for a short while—and how that frustration sometimes leads them to treat others harshly.

I’m not saying I never lose my patience. If I’ve promised to meet someone and I’m running late, or I’ve made a promise and can’t keep it, I get very anxious because I don’t like disappointing others or causing them inconvenience. But it happens, and in those moments, even if I’m upset, I eventually have to come to terms with the situation, accept that I’m human and imperfect, and realize others are the same.

I have no control over events or other people, so I try to make the best of the situation without adding to the problem with resentment or by harshly blaming myself for my mistakes.

A HAPPIER NEW YEAR 

I’ve been feeling unwell for a while now… 

and still am...

It’s the flu—something quite stubborn. My mom is sick too. Here in Budapest, it’s freezing, around -3 to -5°C.

New Year’s Eve was very quiet for me. I spent it at home with my family. We enjoyed a nice dinner and cake, and we watched movies on TV.

Outside, the streets were filled with the loud cracks and booms of firecrackers. From the window, I could see fireworks lighting up the sky. While they can bring joy, I often think about the impact they have on birds. 

                                    

Did you know how harmful fireworks can be for them?

Birds & Blooms experts Kenn and Kimberly Kaufman have explained this:
“Just like many household pets, wild birds can be frightened by fireworks. Sometimes they are, in effect, scared to death. On New Year’s Eve 2010, approximately 5,000 red-winged blackbirds, grackles, and others died when fireworks were set off near their roosting site.

The birds, panicked by the noise, flew in confusion, many crashing into buildings or wires. 

Such mass deaths are rare but happen when large groups of birds are nesting or roosting close together. Loud nighttime explosions disturb not only birds but also other wildlife.”

Let’s remember: we’re not the only living creatures on this planet. 

Birds play a crucial role in maintaining our ecosystem, keeping the Earth as beautiful and livable as it is. It’s our responsibility to protect them. Instead of causing harm, let’s get to know these creatures and appreciate their beauty.

Please, please, please think before you act. There are other ways to have fun that don’t involve harming innocent creatures.

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And now, welcome to 2025! 

What will this year bring? That’s a mystery, but one thing is sure: the future will reflect what we do today.

I wish you all good health, gratitude, and strength in this new year. May your best dreams come true!

I hope to recover soon (along with my whole family) so I can meet my dear friends,

 visit my favorite park, 

walk around Budapest, 

and take beautiful photos to share with you.

Here’s one of my favourite songs to brighten your day: